Yesterday at around midnight I realized something painful, I am to blame for all the challenges I’m facing. I have been standing in my own way. The frustration , unfulfilled dreams and expectations , everything. I actually wrote it down on my Samsung notes, quoting word for word..
I seem to be on a path of self inflicted self sabotage . No more. From today 11/10/2025 I need to give up what I want now for what I want ultimately. I must become the kind of person who can excel in YT. I am not yet. I must become the kind of person who can earn 10k USD pm from YT. I am not yet. I must do what needs doing.. Even if it hurts .
This was written at midnight and I am writing this journal entry at 9.00 am on 11/10/2025 obviously I must have meant it .
Starting today I have to start putting in the work to get me to where I want to go and need to be. I was listening to this audio clip and it was saying that if you randomly asked a cruise ship captain where he was going or where he would dock next, he would respond with zero hesitation.
For me and many other people, 95% according to the audio clip we would startle. We wouldn’t know for sure what the goal was . The captain of the ship knows the final destination and he also knows all the in-between docking station stops he has to make. It’s almost a no-brainer that he will get there unless he has issues with the ship .
I have watched a few cruise ship documentaries myself. I love to do that and if passengers go shopping on the local island or like the docking station and are not back in time. The cruise ship still leaves. They have to find a way to get it at the next port, pretty insane right ? But what if we all had that precision and focus on our lives. What if I had that kind of precision in my life ? I bet I’d be the kind of person who could get to the majority of my dreams. I bet I could be the kind of person who could make 10k and above just from YT.
So going forward, I’m the cruise ship captain of my life, of course guided by God . I need to put together a cruise ship journey itinerary and do the docking stations one at a time until I get to my destination. I know the destination, I’m almost clear on it, I keep changing it and coming back to it but it’s there.
Could you imagine being on such a cruise ship? Where you got in knowing where you were headed but 30 minutes in, the destination changes , that would be the worst experience ever.
But you and I do it everyday in our lives . We set a 6 month or 1 year goal and because we didn’t get to a docking station yet , we immediately abandoned it . No more for me. I’m setting a 6 month goal , cruise ship destination if you will. In 6 months I want to have completely re-branded my personal brand and point it to the 1st final destination, we hit it and I move up .
I started by wanting to teach entrepreneurs how to build an online presence, then I jumped on a shiny object , the AI story telling niche. The interesting thing is that although the audience I got from this niche were actually people wanting to just start in the creator journey, there were entrepreneurs hoping I’d help them build their presence online.
And I know this because they commented on my videos, they DMd me , they emailed and although i knew I could help them , I had changed the cruise ship destination and it was going full throttle in a completely different destination to theirs and mine and if you looked from the outside , I was crushing the space, my views were insane on YT, around 60k pm, I was monetized. The majority of my videos did well and everything was bliss, and it lasted about a year.
Then the worst thing happened. I had anticipated it a little , sort of like a premonition but I had no idea how big of a storm I had up ahead . Job talks of this
Job 3:25 New International Version 25 What I feared has come upon me; what I dreaded has happened to me.
And just like Job I watched everything I had worked so hard for come tumbling down . Views were down, subscribers were down, engagement was down , CRT was the worst I had ever seen, revenue was down, I had never seen this kind of thing .
I knew I was in a vulnerable niche , teaching people to use AI tools to create content and stories. I knew that a percentage would use this to create AI slop and that would make the algorithm unhappy. I knew my videos were getting copied by both humans and humans hiding behind AI and once the dreaded AI update was up, I had officially hit turbulent waters.
I don’t want to go into the details of this yet, because it was one of the most depressing times of my creator’s life. But if I could try to explain it in a sentence, in that period the cruise ship was doomed to crash and the captain got into a sink hole . I would like to take a break here, it’s still too close to me.
Anyway just like Job, I am convinced of a comeback . This time I’ll commit to my destination. I want to help entrepreneurs build an online presence but I have a more clear vision which I really prayed about.
It is helping entrepreneurs , coaches and creators dominate with video. That’s the 1st final destination. My docking stations will mirror my learnings to dominate with video as well. I am all about building in public and I know this is not the kind of story you read right before you hit subscribe but I felt I needed to admit to myself that if I continue on that path , it only gets worse. Just like Job , I believe in restoration and I will commit to the journey.
Docking station number 1 is relearning the basics. Camera confidence, video editing, sound engineering, reading analytics, mindset shift, gear , all of it, and you get to watch and learn with me . I believe in starting out messy , look how messy that got, but if we stay consistent , we get better, we learn more, we get to the destination. You are welcome to watch and learn with me on My YouTube channel.
I call myself an actively learning YouTuber and if you come with me on my cruise ship, we could get to the docking stations together. My name is Peris and I’ll be your captain on this creators cruise, destination Dominate with Video.
I am sharing some of the statistics as of today, kind of like my cruise log 11/10/2025 ( subscribers , views , overall state of my YT channel and other assets etc) . It’s for my reference but you are welcome to look.
Captains Cruise Log 11/10/2025
| Final Destination or 6 month goal Rebrand my personal brand and help entrepreneurs, coaches and creators dominate with video. | |||
| Current docking stations or Focus areas Relearning and teaching the basics Camera confidence, video editing, how to build trust with the audience and reading analytics. Building consistency in content creation. Sharing my journey publicly as I go. |
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| Platform Stats Departure Day 11/10/2025 | |||
| Platform | Followers/Subscribers | AVG views Monthly | Current Focus |
| YouTube | 38.9K | 30K | Rebranding and teaching entrepreneurs, coaches and creators video mastery. |
| TikTok | 67.1K | 95K | Short value packed clips on video mastery plus mindset |
| 700 | Less that 100 | Relatable reels plus creator reflections | |
| 52 | Less that 100 | Repurpose share value packed insights | |
| LinkedLn | 3 | Less that 100 | Share creator lessons and insights |
| Email List | 0 | N/A | Start a Newsletter and build a community |
Keep going!
Thank you 😊. I appreciate